Understanding Mom Guilt

Mom guilt is that nagging inner voice that tells you you’re not doing enough, not doing it right, or somehow “messing up” your kids. It can be fleeting—like when you hand your child a tablet so you can make it through a Zoom call—or more long-standing, like second-guessing choices you’ve made over the years.

Where Mom Guilt Comes From

1. The Feeding Dilemma
One of the earliest triggers for many moms is the topic of breastfeeding. While it may come naturally for some, others face physical, emotional, or logistical challenges. From low supply, to dysphoric milk ejection reflex, to simply feeling touched out—feeding your baby can stir up a lot of conflicting emotions. Add to that the constant messaging that “breast is best,” and it’s no wonder guilt creeps in when a mom chooses formula, pumping, or shared feeding.

2. The Comparison Trap
Social media doesn’t help. We scroll past curated images of moms who seem to have it all together—organic snacks, Montessori playrooms, matching outfits—and suddenly, we feel like we’re falling short. These comparisons feed into our insecurities and reinforce an unrealistic image of what a “perfect mom” should be.

3. The Pressure to Do It All
Many of us carry the belief that we have to do everything ourselves—and do it flawlessly. Asking for help feels like admitting failure. But this superhero mindset can quickly lead to exhaustion and burnout. The truth? It does take a village. Needing support doesn’t make you a bad mom—it makes you human.

You’re Not Alone

Feeling guilty doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong—it usually means you care deeply. And chances are, the moms you’re comparing yourself to are having the same doubts about themselves.

Reminder: You are the best mother for your child. Period.

Working Through Mom Guilt

1. Pause and Breathe
When guilt creeps in, stop and take a few deep, mindful breaths. This simple act can help ground you and create space to respond with intention.

2. Identify the Source
What’s really fueling your guilt? Journaling can be helpful here—track those moments, identify patterns, and explore what beliefs might be underneath.

3. Practice Self-Compassion
You don’t need to be perfect to be an incredible mom. Talk to yourself like you would a friend. Acknowledge your effort, your love, your humanity.

4. Prioritize Self-Care
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Whether it’s a hot shower, a solo walk, or 10 minutes of quiet with your coffee—make space for what restores you. A well-nurtured mom is more present and patient with her kids.

5. Find Your Village
Surround yourself with people who support you—family, friends, other moms, a therapist. You deserve a space to feel seen and supported without judgment.

Mom guilt is real—and it can feel overwhelming. But it doesn’t define your worth as a parent. You’re showing up, loving your kids, and doing your best—and that’s more than enough. Take a deep breath. You’ve got this. If you want to connect with someone who gets it, reach out to me today. Click here